Pirate Dave and his Randy Adventures

Robyn Peterman

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Pirate Dave and his Randy Adventures

Pirate Dave and his Randy Adventures After all was said and done the disgusting novella meant to destroy a story stealing New York Time s best selling author s career was successful Rena Gunderschlict an accountant with no discernible

  • Title: Pirate Dave and his Randy Adventures
  • Author: Robyn Peterman
  • ISBN: 9780989496001
  • Page: 391
  • Format: ebook
  • After all was said and done, the disgusting novella meant to destroy a story stealing New York Time s best selling author s career was successful Rena Gunderschlict, an accountant with no discernible literary talent, and her band of adorable porno writing grannies came up with the worst piece of literature, and I use that word loosely , that was ever written Amazingly eAfter all was said and done, the disgusting novella meant to destroy a story stealing New York Time s best selling author s career was successful Rena Gunderschlict, an accountant with no discernible literary talent, and her band of adorable porno writing grannies came up with the worst piece of literature, and I use that word loosely , that was ever written Amazingly enough, it became a cult classic Who in the hell knew there was an underground need to know and love a Time Traveling Vampire Warlock with erectile dysfunction and his conjoined lady loves, Laverne and Shirley Apparently the need is there and now so is the full version of their story Special Note from Author Robyn Peterman This is a spoof A profane romance spoof not meant for anyone under 18 I was threatened lovingly and repeatedly by my readers to write the full version of Pirate Dave He was born of the need to create a horrific career ending romance novel to destroy a really bad, nasty villainess and Thank you Buddha in a tube top, it worked I laughed my way through writing this and I hope you will enjoy this small slice of my warped brain NO, this is not what I normally write, but I certainly had a good time penning it If you want to read the real romance story, you ll have to peruse HOW HARD CAN IT BE You ll find the first three chapters at the end of the hot mess you re about to read And now, I give you the career ending novella, hopefully not mine otherwise known as PIRATE DAVE AND HIS RANDY ADVENTURES.

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      391 Robyn Peterman
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      Posted by:Robyn Peterman
      Published :2018-04-23T11:46:04+00:00

    One thought on “Pirate Dave and his Randy Adventures

    1. Laurel on said:

      Too funny for words, but this book is just so WRONG! The good news is that it's meant to be wrong in just this way! Be very careful - eating or drinking while reading this author can be hazardous to your health!

    2. J.D. Brown on said:

      I haven't read Peterman's first book "How Hard Can It Be?", which is the book where Pirate Dave originated, but I still loved this! I heard about it from a friend who was reading it. She was real cautious and hesitant while explaining what it was about, and I can understand why. There is a lot of cussing, adult humor, and a general lack of logic to this story that would probably make most people think "WTF is this trash?" - but I love a good silly comedy and I'm glad I took a chance on Pirate Da [...]

    3. Monette Michaels on said:

      I loved How Hard Can It Be?, and so I had to read the story within the story. Pirate Dave is like a train wreck -- you know you wanna look. Once again the fertile mind of Robyn Peterman has made me laugh out loud while reading. No Pepsi was consumed as I read the book. I learned my lesson with her last book -- my sinuses are still recovering. Oh, and this time Mother Nature has a large role to play in addition to Poseidon (damn that scurvy sea god!). This book is definitely adult material; don't [...]

    4. Wrist Decay on said:

      Every time a book is mentioned in a book, I want to read that other book. When someone in a book mentions their favorite author, I read those, too. It should come as no surprise then, that I read Pirate Dave, because this "book" is mentioned in How Hard Can It Be?On long drives to San Fran, I read Pirate Dave aloud to my husband, and if you buy it, I recommend reading it aloud (but not in public). It is pretty much the most awesome awful book ever!

    5. Carole on said:

      A career ending romance spoof? No I don't think so. As long as you don't take this truly disturbing piece of literature seriously and enjoy it for what it is. And that is as a rude, crude, and socially unacceptable parody of really bad romance books. I laughed and learned many new synonyms for a particular male body part that by itself made it worth the read.

    6. Tonya on said:

      If you ever wanted to read a story that had every name you can think of for a penis, this is it. LMAO!!! This story is raunchy, bawdy and hilarious!!! Ms. Peterman has a way with the male genitalia, and it's the funniest thing I have read in a very long time. This is a SPOOF so please read it as such, you won't regret it!!!

    7. Mel on said:

      A fun, short readis is a spoof and is intended for mature readers above 18 years of age. This is the spoof novel used to end the villian's career in " How Hard Can It Be?". Robyn completed Pirate Dave's story at the request of her fans. Thank you Robyn! It was a blast reading his warped world.

    8. Marie on said:

      Outlandish & HilariousRobyn Peterman's Pirate Dave and his Randy Adventures was one of several freebies that I downloaded almost a month ago - and I finally got around to reading it this evening. This is one that I have a hard time fitting into any category. Why? Time-Travelling Vampire Warlock Pirate Dave (I usually shorten that to Pirate Dave) is already horny. Based on information from his fortunetelling colleague, he is working to save the loves of his life from the massive earthquake th [...]

    9. Sarah on said:

      Published in May 2013, this was delightfully silly, raunchy and dirty. I learned more creative euphemisms for the male genitalia and swear words in this one novella than I've acquired in the last 10+ years. This is the story of Pirate Dave, a narcissistic time-traveling vampire warlock with a permanent erection, a crew of scurvy, smelly, and terrified pirates, and a long-term Scrabble war via cellphone with Poseidon. As the story opens, Pirate Dave is braving an earthquake to locate his ultimate [...]

    10. Candace Clark on said:

      Pirate Dave is my favorite. Honestly, I could not put this laugh out loud, pee my pants romp down. The antics between this randy Pirate and his hilarious crew take us on a time traveling journey of love, sprinkled with a little mystery, that involves Mother Nature, Poseidon and cell phone scrabble. Robyn's comedic timing is brilliant and this spoof encompasses it all. This is a great summer read! I will say if you haven't read How Hard Can It Be?, Peterman's debut novel, you must. It is in How H [...]

    11. Patches Braz on said:

      Pirate Dave is a Time-Traveling Vampire Warlock of the grossest kind, but to funny to be all that put off by him. Along with his to concubines Laverne and Shirley conjoined twins well than not than are again!! Pirate Dave is a Scrabble-Holic and plays against Poseidon along with a wicked sense of humor Mother Nature and his Crew Mates and The Blow Up Doll! This has to be the funniest and weirdest book I have ever read. My family thought I was on something I was laughing so hard! This is an Adult [...]

    12. Rosanna Leo on said:

      Start crank calling Poseidon and get your beef bayonet ready! This is the craziest story I have ever read crazy it is brilliant. Ms. Peterman has crafted a pirate/romance spoof that will have you spewing your drink. I laughed out loud and fell in lust with vampire warlock Pirate Dave. Just insane in the very best way. The description of Dave crank-calling water god Poseidon had me in stitches. Robyn Peterman has just become one of my go-to authors.

    13. Stacy McKitrick on said:

      She ain't kidding when she says it took a warped brain to write this. However did she think up all that crap? This is a very funny spoof of a so-called paranormal romance. Yeah, not much romance, but lots of raunchiness. It helps to read "How Hard Can it Be?" first, so you get all the references. Very funny!

    14. Jim Mckitrick on said:

      I am not a romance reader, but I was told I had to read this little thing. It was so bad, it was good. I didn't realize there were so many names for the male member. If you want a good spoof, this is it.

    15. Angela on said:

      Absolutely laugh out loud romance spoof from Robyn's book "How Hard Can It Be". This is NOT a romance story, but a spoof of one from the book. I laughed so hard sometimes I thought I'd wet my pants!

    16. Marie on said:

      Raunchy and hilarious!If you are looking for a quick read that will make you laugh, look no further. Ridiculous, over the top humor and a silly story will keep you entertained. Only recommended for those with a twisted sense of humor.

    17. April Wood on said:

      What’s It About?(Contains Spoilers)This romance spoof novella was born from How Hard Can It Be, when an aspiring author leaks an outlandish story idea to a best selling author. Pirate Dave and His Randy Adventures is the above mentioned leaked story, which readers begged Author Robyn Peterman to write.Pirate Dave, a time-traveling vampire warlock with erectile dysfunction, addicted to online scrabble, is a real piece of work. His bodacious, red-haired babes are twins, chosen to relieve his pro [...]

    18. Cherri-Anne on said:

      A YO HO HA HA HA of a story If you have not read How Hard Can It Be yet, please do so before reading this book. Why you ask? Well! This story is actually the same story that Rena wrote in HHCIB, nicely finished up by Robyn herself at the request of her fans. This spoof has everything in it that should ruin an evil author’s career – guaranteed! WOW! Where to start with this one?!?! The stuff that goes on in this one is so over the top hilarious it does deserve its own book! Pirate Dave is a t [...]

    19. Lori Clark cook on said:

      Ok, I have to admit, the only reason I got this book was because it was the career ending publication created in How Hard Can It Be. I laughed out loud reading the story as it was put together by Rena and her adorable porn grannies. I just had to see how the whole story came together.Pirate Dave is well, dang, I don't know how to describe him. He's gross, he's irreverent, he's horny ALL the time. Did it make me laugh out loud? Yes, I cannot lie. The dialogue in this book is funny, in a perverse [...]

    20. Bookmom on said:

      This story came about when fans of “How Hard Can It Be” begged the author to give them the full novella used in that book where a writer steals other people’s ideas. To destroy that author’s career, she is provided a perfectly disgusting, outrageous tale about the only Time-Traveling Vampire Warlock in existence who is also a pirate, and his rather large, seemingly never satisfied appendage.So yes, this novella is purposely disgusting – it certainly won’t win any literary awards. But [...]

    21. Vida Lewis-cornish on said:

      OMG this was funny. I was reading while at the repair shop. I know the other patrons probably though I was crazy for the giggling and laughing. I almost lost it with the troll.Wooo. Silly funny all over, and got me some new online Scrabble or WWF words to play. Looking out for the letters AZX! (JSYK, Lightning up the wazoo almost did me in!)

    22. Gnome Claire *Wishes she was as cool as Gnome Ann* on said:

      Hilarious! This is the most disturbing romance I've ever read- it's perfect!I wouldn't read this if you haven't read How Hard Can it Be? first, it won't be as funny (you certainly won't get all the diy tool jokes) and you should read How Hard Can it Be? anyway!

    23. Abbey on said:

      This was amusing and crazy and fun, everything that I needed in one short read. I read some of the start of 'How Hard Can It Be?', which I think I'll be reading soon, I can already tell from the first few chapters that I'll probably appreciate this more after.

    24. Carol Ward on said:

      I haven't laughed this hard since the Princess and the Penis. :-)

    25. Dani Hodge on said:

      LOL, omg this was hilarious. I absolutely loved How Hard Can it Be? And the making of Pirate Dave! And this little spoof was hilarious! Now on to Size Matters! Loving this series! Highly recommend!

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